Friend or Foe – First Impressions and Their Importance at Interviews

When we meet someone for the first time, we pretty much immediately have a ‘gut’ reaction that tells us whether we like this person – whether in fact we see them as a friend or a foe. Where does that instinct come from, and how does it come up so quickly with such a damning or embracing reaction? More importantly, if we’re out to create a great first impression when going for a new job, how can we stack the odds in our favour and flash ‘friend’ into our interviewer’s consciousness?

Without getting into too much technical jargon – it’s commonly known that the brain has two hemispheres; the left deals with logic, and the right with creativity. This is what we know as the new brain or cortex. But there’s also an additional dimension, the pre-historic brain or hypo-thalamus (the brain stem, in fact) which is solely responsible for instincts. This was essential for making split-second life saving decisions in ancient times.

Research from Switzerland more recently refers to the pre-historic brain as the ‘Gatekeeper’. Not being capable of rational thinking, the Gatekeeper’s sole function is to instantly judge whether someone is a friend or a foe, and it decides purely on instinct. If an approach causes the Gatekeeper stress, it switches on the fight or flight response. This immediately shuts down all other message receptors, and makes any further attempts at communication impossible. Today’s terminology would be you never get a second chance to make a first impression!

Understanding how this relates to modern life is essential for effective communication. Interviewees must learn to build a ‘Language of Trust’, and as the Gatekeeper doesn’t have the capacity to think, that language isn’t just verbal. In the first 10 to 20 seconds of meeting an interviewer, your instinctive signals must convey the message of a ‘friend’.

Your body language will convey this, with open and relaxed movements, gestures, facial expressions and eye contact. The speed of your speech must be controlled and gentle, and your voice modulation and tone must stay calm. The Gatekeeper’s decision will also be based on your appearance, clothes, smell, enthusiasm and posture. Finally, don’t invade his or her personal space.

Your total focus initially is to get past the Gatekeeper. Then you can build and develop rapport, and open your interviewer’s message receptors. Once you’re through this initial first impression, you can move on with developing a relationship with your interviewer, for the gate will now be open to what you have to offer.

Finally, let’s look at research done at The Thomas Gordon Institute on communication. They looked at the impact of words, voice, face and body, and their contribution to believability. Measuring the effectiveness of each component of communication, they came up with the following:

Facial Expression = 35%, Body Language = 35%, Voice = 23%, Words = 7%.

So actually, the gestures we make, our appearance, and how we deliver our words have more importance than what we actually say. The Gatekeeper, remember, has no capacity for rational thought, just an instinctive reaction evolved from ancient times. The gut-feeling we get is really an ancient brain feeling. Understanding this will ensure you get off to the very best start and help you to take control.

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